split w/ Bullshit Market

by Captain Three Leg

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01:17
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00:35
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00:48
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about

Trashfuck Records [TFR-38]

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released January 8, 2016

Tracks 1-11 = Captain Three Leg
Recorded March 15, 2015 with Reaper. Vocals recorded August 16, 2015. All songs written and performed by Captain Three Leg except #6 (Meatmen).

Nate - Vokills
Andrew - Vokills
Andy - Guitar + Bass
Brian - Drums
____________________________________________________

Tracks 12-17 = Bullshit Market
Recorded 2015 at Trashpad in Detroit and Fort Trashfuck in Eastpointe. All songs written by Bullshit Market except #13 (Blink-182) and #15 (Throbbing Gristle).

Bullshit Market is Caleb and Patrick.

Thanks to Andy & C3L, shouts to Will Olter, Super Humman, Scott Stapp + Naomi Elizabeth.

bullshitmarket.bandcamp.com

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Captain Three Leg

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Track Name: The Stakeout
(instrumental)
Track Name: Long and Hard
(lyrics: Nate)
Been at work all week now it’s time to go
To the punk, metal and or grindcore show
Meet up with some friends to have a good time
With some cheap ass weed and a bottle of wine
Getting tore up as the bands play real loud
Don’t think there’s anything that could bring me down

I live my life just for times like this
Just a couple of friends and a few good laughs

Doesn’t even matter if anybody comes
I know this because they usually don’t
As long as we are here enjoying ourselves
Living for music, movies and fun
Keep on raging, as we get old
Don’t tell me my story’s been told
I’ll keep on writing it to the very end
Screaming and yelling with my friends

I live my life just for times like this
Just a couple of friends and a few good laughs

One of the best reasons to get up everyday
Is to make fucking music that we like to play
So many people always doing it all wrong
So we have to fix it that’s why we play on
Slow, Fast and hard just a couple of ways
That we are able to put you in a daze
Not just another cheap knock of popular shit
Wouldn’t even know what that sounds like anyway

I live my life just for times like this
Just a couple of friends and a few good laughs
Track Name: Turn Signal Social Justice Warrior
(lyrics: Andrew)
You forgot to use your left turn signal
And that's my signal to make you die
Rolling around in your goofmobile
You fuckin' think that you're too cool for school?

My word is law
And that word is murder
I'm gonna shove my tail pipe
Up your catalytic converter

You drive worse than a sleep deprived ape
Your shitty fuckin' driving leaves me with sour grapes
Runnin' red lights like it's cool to do
If I were your dad, I would disown you

Fuckin' fuck yourself
And fuck your Mini Cooper
Better Watch your ass
Better watch your pooper
Track Name: Door Side Down
(lyrics: Nate)
Run as fast as you can across the field
In immediate danger of imminent release
Finally open the door and its filled with flies
Just have sit, but that’s not the surprise

Door side down
That’s how the Porto Potty lands
Door side down
Hope you didn’t have any plans
Door side down
Completely covered in shit
Door side down
Filled up to the brim
Track Name: Reserved Hatred
(lyrics: Nate)
It finally seems there is nobody trying to tell me what to do
That just took 33 years, cant believe what I’ve been through

Threat of death
Threat of life
Sometimes they both seemed
The fucking same

Can’t always forgive, because I don’t believe that shit
Just cant seem to forget, because I lived with it

Might be Gone
Could still be here
No longer matters
Because I’m alive

One step forward, then another one tends to follow
Not living in the past, in a strange lifeless world
That was filled with sadness, loneliness and hate
But this doesn’t mean that I don’t still hate you
Track Name: Mr. Tapeworm
(Meatmen cover)
Track Name: Flying Stench of Fried Decay
(lyrics: Andrew)
Atoms will be splitting
Wild animals will be released
When the shit goes down, which it will
All you fuckers will pay big time

The dogs of sloppiness
Hot on your trail
The world has a chromosome problem
Which you cannot deny

Eaten to death
We're on short supply
The stench of a fat man's breath
Signals our demise

Pants will be splitting
Exercise will be denied
Animals in a zoo
When it's feeding time

This is our legacy
Now is our time
Asleep at the wheel
Time to die and fry
Track Name: Happy Birthday
(lyrics: Andrew)
Today's the day, it's your birthday
Party favors, and all that shit
Pin the tail on the donkey
With lots of birthday gifts

We got you a horse
A clown who juggles, of course

Chocolate and vanilla cake
It's your treat, it's all the rage
Nachos, soda, cookies, pie
Enough to make you die

Bouncey house in full effect
Look out for the kid who's deaf
Walking tacos, everyone
You're number one

Oh, goddammit!
Lets call it a day
I gotta get drugs from dude around the way
It's been fun, but I gotta say
Time to get weird in a righteous way

Horse is gone
Clown got high
Does anybody have a ride for this guy?
Blasted out and I'm done
Seriously, leave
I've got my gun
Track Name: Uh, I'm Just Gonna Stay Home Tonight
(lyrics: Andrew)
Say you're throwing a party
But I'm not gonna show up
I would rather hang out
With my fuckin' self

No day, anyway
I'd rather be a bum
It does not matter
I'd rather have no fun

Saturday night, I stay at home
I'd rather jack off than leave my comfort zone
You can have fun if you wish
The idea of fun makes me sick

Feeling so disgusted
Getting so high
Bubble on my brain
At least I feel no pain

No day, anyway
I'd rather be a bum
It does not matter
I'd rather have no fun
Track Name: Blind Ego
(lyrics: Nate)
Could build you a statue but it wouldn’t be big enough
To match up to your ego that’s bigger than a house
Walk around with a stride that seems to say "fuck you"
Not realizing that you’re the one who is fucked

There is no place anywhere for a person like you
Stomping on everyone without a thought at all

Making enemy’s in every town that you go
Because you don’t know how to treat people at all
To you everyone else is competition for chicks
Not that they even glance your fucking way

Garbage lowlife son of a bitch
Played out want to sell out dead in a ditch

That’s where you’ll end up at some after party
Cut and gutted like a cheap piñata
Track Name: Fat Guy Goes Nutzoid
(Lyrics: Nate + Andrew)
Always just sitting around
Dropping your burgers all over town
Flooding out of your wheelchair
I just can’t seem to care

Couldn’t be much more dirty than you
Haven’t had a bath since 92’
You flop out on onto the floor
You probably shouldn’t eat anymore

You’re a big fat piece of shit
Oh my god, he’s got tits!
Your neck looks like fucking jelly
Not to mention your huge ass belly

You’re bombed out like Afghanistan
Why don’t you work out like a man?
Ate all the Taco Bell in the state
Now you can’t find your dick to masturbate

You burgle snacks like a whore
Emptying out the grocery store
If you drop your sandwich, it will mold
Before you go to bed, check all your folds
It keeps it warm for you to savor
Adds a distinct salty flavor
If you run out of food, don’t eat your cats
That’s why you have a supply of rats

You’re a big fat piece of shit
Oh my god, he’s got tits!
Your neck looks like fucking jelly
Not to mention your huge ass belly

You’re bombed out like Afghanistan
Why don’t you work out like a man?
Ate all the Taco Bell in the state
Now you can’t find your dick to masturbate
Track Name: Bullshit Market - Fentoozler
(Blink-182 cover)
Track Name: Bullshit Market - Discipline
(Throbbing Gristle cover)