Get all 89 Captain Three Leg releases available on Bandcamp and save 80%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Captain Three Leg / Uddercock, 31 Uplifting Songs, Captain Three Leg / Decomposing Serenity, Mouth Star, Captain Three Leg / Godstomper, Captain Three Leg / Esmectatons, Artificial Live, Captain Three Leg / Taco Tuesday, and 81 more.
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The weirdest guy who ever lived
is the mysterious Grubular X
with his befuddling cunt cock
and his over-starched collar
and his peculiar Hawaiian shirt
the movie St. Elmo's Fire is like poison to the eyes
you'll fall down and beg for mercy when you see it on TV
you'll beg for mercy when it comes on TV
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if anyone wants
you're welcome to kick me
god pisses me off
he's always trying to trick me
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elderly people don't drive too well
they crash into you and you'll see them in hell
they drive so slow and then cut you off
they don't get the soup, they just get the broth
old people have nothing to lose
they know they'll to die soon
they're all miserable and want to die
they talk about golf and slices of pie
they drive like shit and they're out to kill
if you don't watch out, they probably will
I hope I never end up like them
wrecking cars while wearing Depends
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A Sea Lion
00:11
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a sea lion bit off half of Meryl Streep's foot at the shopping mall
the mall cop shot the sea lion in the chest
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(no lyrics)
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it would be cool if you could kill yourself as often as you'd liked
I'd be up to about 600 times today alone
but you only get one say, you gotta make it count
you gotta find a way to enjoy your today
that movie Groundhog Day wasn't really true
you can't kill yourself every day
too bad, because that would be pretty fucken' cool
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(instrumental)
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